Tuesday, May 18, 2010

you can never go wrong with dragons

so the other week, in Nathan Bransford's This Week In Publishing, he linked an article that condemned using dragons to fill plot holes. while i agree that this would be wrong to do in a non-fantasy novel (obvs), i was somewhat offended. after all, you just can't go wrong with dragons in a fantasy novel!

and i can prove it.

Ex 1

"Hyacinth, you are my whole world!" Macho cried bitterly. "How can you not love me? I've risked everything for you!"

"Macho, I told you years ago I could never love you! Why are you doing this to me? To yourself?" Hyacinth wept, face firmly buried in her hands.

so why can't Hyacinth love Macho? the answer is obvious!

"Hyacinth, all I want is a reason. Give me one good reason you cannot love me, and I will leave you alone for forever." Macho's voice was filled with quiet pain, but he sounded resolved.

"Oh, Macho!" Hyacinth wailed. "I am in love with a dragon!"

see? plot hole filled. thank you, dragon.


Ex 2

Sasha backed up until she reached the cavern wall. This was it. This was the end. There was no way she was getting out of this scrape. How many times had Grandpa warned her to use her head before plunging into potentially dangerous situations? If only she had one more chance to heed his advice.

Fifty angry sorcerors closed in on her. Their hands were raised, and a wind was gusting around the chamber from the spell they were casting. Within moments, Sasha would be a tiny pile of ashes--fifty times over.

Good-bye, Grandpa! she thought. Please, let it be quick and painless.

oh, no! it's the end of Sasha! or...is it?

Wait! What was that, skulking behind the sorcerors? Could it be....

"OMG A DRAGON!" Sasha screamed.

Chaos erupted. The sorcerors forgot about Sasha completely in their sudden fear and confusion. Sasha broke through the disorganized mob and fled through the tunnels.

Thank the High One!

yes, thank the High One! another impossible plot hole filled by a dragon! seriously, they should get paid at least a ten perent commission for all their great work!


Ex 3

"Kitheran, how do you do it? That demonstration back there was amazing--no one in the history of Generan has ever wielded such great power! Please, what is your secret?" Lirean strode beside Kitheran, gazing at him as though he had never really seen him before. The miracles he had just witnessed were beyond belief.

Kitheran did not immediately answer.

come on, Kitheran! what are you waiting for! what is your secret?? we won't tell....

"I regret I cannot reveal my secrets to you, Lirean, old friend. I cannot even tell you why. Please, do not press me on this point! My mind is resolute."

They were at Kitheran's chambers. With a hasty goodnight, he left Lirean standing in the empty hallway.

In his room, Kitheran made a soft noise of distress. He resisted as long as possible, trying to make sure Lirean was out of earshot before giving in. Then, with a blossom of hot air and a strange keening cry, he burst into the shape of...a dragon.

of course! Kitheran is a dragon! it all makes sense now...

and there you have it! have i not proved my point? are not dragon's the best patches for gaping holes in fantasy plots??? they are amazing! unstoppable! PERFECT!!!!

okay, confession time. perhaps the biggest reason i advocate dragons so heavily is that i actually used one in my novel...i can only hope agents will read this post and change their minds so i will not be rejected in the future!!

4 comments:

  1. yes. A dragon is definitely that missing component to my MS.

    lol, great names by the way. Macho. *snorts*

    Um, so, also, I didn't see your bestie story on Tahereh's blog. I looked! Did I miss it??

    So far I like your writing style, even when you're joking. I wouldn't worry too much about more than your share of rejections.

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  2. write that dragon in NOW!! your poor ms...

    lol. thanks for the vote of confidence! and i haven't posted my bestie story yet--i'm still ONE WORD over the limit and i'm trying to finish revising it--and cut it down to size...i want to get it posted today, though : )

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  3. hahahaha i LOVE IT!

    i'd write more, but OMG A DRAGON--

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  4. oh no! Tahereh, run for your life! you have to live so you can judge the Contest That Will Blow Your Mind!!!!

    LOL, great comment : )

    infinite <3 to all my comment-ers

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